In recent years, all over the world, Biotechnology has become a significant
issue because of using DNA. The aim of this paragraph is to explain the impact
of DNA and to describe the relationship between the DNA and PCR machine.
With regard to criminal cases, Biotechnology is the best method to identify a
guilty. For example, if the policemen find a burned body, they will take a
sample from hair or nails and send to laboratory to examine them. One of the
most important machine is polymerase chain reaction ( PCR ). It tends to
redouble the DNA, which extracted from the sample, in order to make more
tests to make sure or identity of the burned body.
Something strange has happened to the formatting of this post, Saqer. Did you copy and paste it from a Word file? If you want to know how to make it look more attractive, let me know and I'll show you in the LAB.
ReplyDeleteIt's good to see that you're trying to introduce the theme of your writing in the first few sentences, but actually your paragraph is about how biotechnology is used in criminal cases. It might therefore be better to explain first that criminal investigations provide an example of how important Biotechnology is in modern-day life.
Within your main paragraphs, I think you need to create a stronger link between criminal investigations and the PCR machine. Perhaps "laboratory" can provide that link and then you don't need to add much. Just something like "One of the most important machines in the laboratory is PCR". (Is PCR a machine or a process though?)
Some language points for you to look at:
COLLOCATION: can you find better expressions than "make more tests" and "make sure of identity"?
WORD FORM : Can you correct "identify a guilty"?
WORD-LEVEL GRAMMAR: check the correct pattern of use with the word SEND. How is this word usually used in a sentence?
MEANING and SENTENCE STRUCTURE. Are you sure that "tends to" is suitable for describing what a machine does? Also, can you see a problem with "DNA, which extracted from the sample"?